Its funny how the majority yells yes, then when they find themselves in the midst of the predicament they’re stunned by their inability to do so. I believe it depends on the situation. For the sake of conversation, lets say this is the person’s first time cheating and never before have they given you a reason to believe they were a “cheater.” Would you still leave or would you try to work it out? For me, the biggest thing with trying to work it out is the loss of trust. Trust is one of the foundational bricks in a relationship—if you’re aiming for a healthy one. Staying with a person that cheated would require you to learn how to trust that person again. Would you question them everyday; or would you develop paranoia about everything that person does? You have to carefully evaluate the situation and who you are as a person because that can very well determine your solution to the problem.
You usually have three personalities: a hard-hearted person, a wise-man, and a fool for love. The hard-hearted person is not only going to leave but they’re most likely going to disassociate themselves from the other party completely; the wise-man will use both their brain and heart to try and come up with the most appropriate remedy to the situation; and the fool for love is going to stay no matter what. I know we all wish we could be the wise-man but the majority of us wind up being either hot or cold: hard-hearted or a fool. Both can pose as a problem when it comes to relationships because relationships are tricky.
Sometimes society applauds the person who leaves when they’ve been cheated on yet leaving isn’t always the best solution. Yes I said it. Leaving is NOT always the best solution. Have you both sat down and had a discussion yet? What was the person’s reason for cheating? Could you have done anything differently? Do you both share the same desires for the relationship? There are tons of questions to be considered during the “aftermath.” If the cheating party is unwilling to communicate, then most likely you should leave. Moving forward requires communication and a revival and if you cant come together for that phase than chances are, the root of the problem has not been taking care of and that person could very well cheat again. Now on to the fool. Being a fool is never cute. The only problem is, the fool rarely recognizes that they are a fool. Whenever there’s a fool in a relationship, its already unhealthy. There is no remedy but for the fool to deal with their issues first before entering into another relationship. Being a fool is the tree that grows from the seed of insecurity. Being insecure about (your body, your face, your weight, your childhood, your job, your economic status, and etc.) will most certainly turn you into a fool and not just in relationships but in all areas of life where communication and companionship is involved.
In my new book titled: Running Back to Love, you get the opportunity to see how women with insecurities handle relationships. Although its fiction, it sheds some light on love gone wrong. To see love gone wrong can help you to recognize when love goes right.
Love, Writing, and Besos!
Your Favorite Author,
Demetrius Dudley